


This Is Me Trying

by jeremybearimy5972



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Hope Lupin/Lyall Lupin (mentioned), Hurt/Comfort, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:20:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26456314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeremybearimy5972/pseuds/jeremybearimy5972
Summary: Lyall takes care of an ill Remus early one morning.
Relationships: Lyall Lupin & Remus Lupin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	This Is Me Trying

**Author's Note:**

> Mentions of nausea and vomiting (non-explicit).

Sat upright in bed, while reading a new novel, Lyall Lupin found his attention shifting from the story to his son when he heard his light footfall across the corridor. Glancing at the clock, he saw that it was nearly three o’clock in the morning - a time at which his teenage boy should certainly be in bed and asleep. 

Getting up to investigate his son’s whereabouts, he soon saw a sliver of light coming from the bathroom, its door slightly ajar. 

“Remus?” Lyall knocked on the door. “You alright son?” 

“Yeah,” Remus’s soft voice called back. 

“Can I come in?” Lyall asked. 

“Mnm,” Remus replied quietly. 

Lyall pushed the door open, revealing a rather pale Remus Lupin, laying on his back on the cold tile floor, an arm draped over his forehead. 

“What’s wrong?” Lyall asked, sitting down on the floor next to him. 

“Felt like I was going to be sick,” Remus said. 

“Do you have a fever?” Remus shrugged. Lyall reached over to feel his forehead. It was slightly warm but not alarmingly so. 

“Dad, I’m fine,” Remus said weakly, pushing Lyall’s hand away. 

“You’re not fine if you’re feeling ill,” Lyall replied. “Did you feel ill earlier?”

“No,” Remus answered at first. After a dubious look from Lyall, he amended his answer. “A bit.” 

Lyall sighed and stood to wet a washcloth under the sink to give to Remus. Remus took it gratefully and placed it over his forehead. Lyall sat back down and placed a comforting hand on his son’s shoulder while he lay on the floor. 

“We’ve talked about this Remus,” Lyall said. 

“I know,” Remus mumbled. 

“You need to tell us if you’re not feeling well,” Lyall lectured his son. “We can’t help if you don’t tell us what’s going on.”

“I _know_ , Dad,” Remus repeated dejectedly. 

Lyall didn’t have the opportunity to continue his lecture as Remus bolted upright when a wave of nausea overtook him and was promptly sick in the toilet. Lyall quickly shifted around next to the toilet, brushing the hair out of Remus’s face and rubbing his back until he finished. 

Remus sat back against the wall when the nausea subsided, shutting his eyes and focusing on his breathing. Lyall waited patiently as his son calmed down from his sickly ordeal. Nights such as this were not uncommon in the Lupin household. The full moon would not occur for a couple of weeks yet, but whether due to his condition or some other factor, Remus often found himself falling ill far from the full moon without much explanation. 

Remus finally slowed down his breathing after a few minutes and Lyall saw some color return to his face, though he still looked rather pale. 

“Feeling better?” Lyall asked. Remus nodded. “Do you want to go back to bed?”

Remus nodded once more and Lyall stood up, his son doing the same, though more shakily than his father. Lyall backed out into the corridor while Remus leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom and raked a hand through his hair, causing it to stick up in all directions. 

“Could I actually get some water first?” Remus asked softly. 

“Course,” Lyall descended the stairs, intending to grab a glass of water while Remus returned to bed. Nevertheless, Remus appeared at the kitchen table just as Lyall had gotten the glass. 

“You should be in bed,” Lyall said. “It’s three in the morning, you’ll be tired later.” 

“I’m not tired,” Remus lied, as he yawned not five seconds later. He rested his head on his hand and rubbed his eyes. 

“Drink, you’ll feel better,” Lyall handed Remus the glass of water. 

Remus sat quietly and drank the water slowly while Lyall made a cup of tea for himself. It wasn’t the best of ideas, drinking caffeinated tea in the early hours of the morning, but Lyall knew he wouldn’t be getting back to sleep anytime soon so he figured he might as well. 

“Dad?” Remus yawned softly. 

“Yeah?” Lyall replied, taking a sip of his tea. 

“When’s Mum getting back?” Remus asked. 

“Day after tomorrow,” Lyall answered. Hope was visiting family for the week after multiple assurances from Lyall and Remus that they would, in fact, be fine and not burn the house down in her absence. “Is that why you were feeling sick? Missing Mum?” 

“Dunno,” Remus replied. “Maybe a bit.” 

“I can call her if you want, she won’t mind coming back a day or two early,” Lyall offered. 

“No, it’s alright,” Remus shook his head. “I’ll be fine.” 

Lyall knew Remus was dodging the question, but also knew that he wasn’t likely to get an answer out of the ill and tired teenager at that time of the morning. Lyall had never been the best at words or heart-to-hearts and at that moment he desperately wished his wife was there to comfort their son. She’d know what to say, she always did. 

“I’m sorry,” Lyall said quietly. “I wish I could do more to help you.” 

Since that horrific, life-altering night in 1965, Lyall had grappled with immense guilt and fear of failure concerning his son. He wished more than anything he could help him, take his son’s pain away, do anything but feel like an awkward, useless figure unable to comfort his only son. 

Despite Lyall’s self-deprecation and perceived inability to help his son, Remus did not feel the same, as he so often tried to assure his father. 

“You do help,” Remus replied. “You’re always here for me and you always help me when I need it, both you and Mum.” 

“Dad,” Remus began. “I’m _okay_. I promise.” 

Lyall sighed and looked up to meet his son’s gaze. Remus was growing up to be one of the kindest, most thoughtful individuals Lyall had ever met, despite the pain and suffering he had faced every month for years and years; Lyall couldn’t be prouder of the young man his son was becoming. 

“Thank you,” Lyall smiled. “You’re a good kid, Remus. I hope you know that.” 

Remus gave him a soft smile. He stood out of his chair and pulled Lyall into a tight hug. Lyall had never been much of a hugger, not like Remus and Hope were, but found himself greatly comforted at that moment by Remus’s unwavering love and compassion. 

“Love you, Dad,” Remus said, his voice slightly muffled from the hug. 

“I love you too, Remus,” Lyall replied. 

Remus pulled away first, stifling another yawn as he rubbed his tired eyes. He looked much better than he had in the bathroom, the pale, ill look being replaced by one of early morning tiredness. 

“Go to bed, you’re tired,” Lyall said. He filled another glass of water for Remus and instructed him to take it to bed. 

“Just knock if you feel ill again, I’ll be awake,” Lyall told Remus as he walked back up the stairs to his bedroom. 

“Will do,” Remus yawned. “Night, Dad. Or morning, I guess.” 

“Get your arse in bed,” Lyall laughed. Remus grinned back at him as he went into his room and climbed into bed. 

“Sleep well son,” Lyall called out as he flipped the light off and shut the door closed. 

Lyall returned to his and Hope’s bedroom and laid on top of the bed. He picked up the novel he had been reading earlier for a few minutes before setting it back down again. He turned over in bed and began to settle down, musing over the events of the early morning. 

Lyall couldn’t change the past or the words he uttered a decade earlier. His thoughtless bigotry had nearly destroyed his son’s life, but ultimately Remus was right. What’s done is done; Lyall couldn’t change the past, nor should he dwell upon it. The next best thing would be to ensure he was there for his son: helping, protecting, and supporting him. Regardless of whether it was one o’clock in the afternoon and wanting help with schoolwork or three o’clock in the morning and needing taking care of after an illness, Lyall would always be there for his son.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I wanted to write a short little piece on Lyall and Remus’s relationship because they don’t get nearly enough attention in my opinion. The title is from Taylor Swift’s This Is Me Trying. Folklore massively inspired me to get back into writing and this song inspired this fic; imagining Lyall struggling with his regret and guilt over Remus’s attack while also trying to be a good, stable dad for him. Feel free to comment or leave a kudos if you enjoyed, I always appreciate it! Hope everyone has a great day and stays safe and healthy!  
> Tumblr: @reignofstrain


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